So many times, I hear people talk about “Work-Life Balance,” and it immediately makes me chuckle because I think, “good luck with that.” I’ve yet to see anyone pull off the ever-elusive “Work-Life Balance.” I believe it’s all about fitting it all. You must integrate love and work into your life. Yet, knowing that a person can only occupy one space at a time permits you to focus without guilt in each area.
I’m bringing this subject up now because “winter is coming” and adds a thicker layer of sadness and stress. Plus, believing you can’t have love, along with everything else in life, can take an emotional toll on you. Instead, let’s get you ready to avoid burnout and disappointment in your quest for balance by heading some fundamental steps.
Here are seven steps you can take to fit it all into your life:
1. Take an inventory of the time that you spend doing non-essential tasks that don’t serve you emotionally, physically, or financially (i.e., getting into the vortex of social media for hours throughout your day) and free that time up for more important affairs.
2. Stop spending time with toxic people. Aside from getting your time back, there’s a level of despair or non-productivity that a toxic person can cause you to feel, which will keep you from attempting to reach your goals.
3. Now that you have freed up some time, schedule important “Me Time” for love and self-care! Include things like getting out on dates (whether you’re single or in a relationship). Commit to working out, enjoying an occasional massage, keep to a healthy diet, and anything that will increase your emotional and physical health.
4. Establish a mindset practice; this can be guided meditation, visualization, journaling, scripting, yoga. The list goes on. The key is to implement and integrate it even if it’s 10-15 minutes per day to release the stressors we accumulate daily.
“…before happiness and success… comes your perception of the world. So before we can be happy, we need to create a positive reality that allows us to see the possibility for both. ” ~Shawn Achor
5. Line up your resources. If you’re a single parent, be sure you have a sitter that you can trust. Work with a dating coach that can help with your dating dilemmas and blind spots. Hire a matchmaker to do the vetting for you. Get a cleaning person if you hate those chores.
6. Don’t feel guilty when you have to dedicate time to work, family, fun, or anything else. Every one of your life areas has value, and you should give them its due time. The key is NOT to feel guilty when you’re with your family, work, or when you are playing and having fun, being present, and thoroughly enjoying all the moments while experiencing them.
7. Stop worrying so much! They say, “those who worry suffer twice.” Focus on what you can control or do now to get you to your goal and stop solving problems before they occur. There’s value in planning and being proactive, but be and do your best right now!
As a Matchmaker and Relationship Coach, here is one MAJOR reminder I share with our clients, “attracting love, having a relationship, growing a business, raising children (even as a single parent), including any relevant aspect of your life is NOT mutually exclusive. You can have it all as long as you forget about balancing and focus on being present.
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